Why Some People Don't Talk About Money With Their Partner

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People who are stressed about their finances are often wary of talking about money with their romantic partners, even though it may be beneficial to their relationship, new research finds.

People worried about bills, feeling overwhelmed about overspending or concerned about money management may expect a "money talk" to lead to an argument, so they avoid bringing up the topic, according to a report from researchers at Cornell University and Yale University, published this month in The Journal of Consumer Psychology. Yet prior research has found that communicating about money helps couples spend more responsibly and better manage their debt.

"They anticipate conflict, so they're choosing not to have these conversations at all," said Emily Garbinsky, associate professor of marketing and management communication at Cornell's business school and one of the study's authors.

Why is it so difficult for some people to talk about money with their partners in the first place?

"It's a defense mechanism," she said. "But with financial issues, the more you avoid it, the worse it gets."

"We're each bringing our own money baggage into a relationship," she said. "Sometimes it's a handbag. Sometimes it's three large suitcases."